New York Mag's Dossier on Prince Harry

Prince Harry's trip to the United States yesterday did not contain events like attending birthday parties dressed as a Nazi, nor snorting shots of vodka with his blokes as they suction-cup wine glasses to their nipples on his itinerary.

Instead, Harry visited wounded soldiers at Walter Reed and witnessed the destruction left by Hurricane Sandy in New Jersey. The prince even managed to find time to squeeze in a game of polo in Greenwich, Connecticut.

Tell us Big H, where did the fun, partying playboy go?

New York magazine's Ashley Collman presents a dossier of Harry's past tomfoolery in the May 13 issue that contains extensive research.

Aside from general information like date of birth, age and education, Collman creates a track record of Harry's mishaps.

Everything from swallowing a live goldfish at the wedding of a former nanny to losing a game of strip billiards in Las Vegas, Harry has done it all.

This again begs the question, "What happened to Harry?" Did the military really straighten him out?

Doubtful, considering Harry got called out for comparing his gunner job to playing video games. Could this be the reason for his army buddies dubbing him "Bullet Magnet?" One could only assume.

What makes the article great, however, is the diagram showing all of Harry's rumored female acquaintances. New York mag even divides the diagram based on social class: socialite, commoners and minor celebrities. Most intriguing is that Pippa Middleton traded flirty texts back and forth with her brother-in-law. Now that is saucy.

We shouldn't be so critical of the 28-year-old prince. After all, who wouldn't love to record the voice-mail greeting of Queen Elizabeth with your older brother?

“Wassup, this is Liz. Sorry I’m away from the throne. For a hotline to Philip, press one …”